UnRepentant, The Former Cranky UnDead Bastard (unrepentant) wrote in unrs_ribcage,
UnRepentant, The Former Cranky UnDead Bastard

Temper Flares UnExpectedly at Night Club

- Saturday night started off alright. Wasn't really in the mood to go to the Skin 2 because I am still feeling a little burnt after being burned by J.F. i went because I knew a lot of my friends would be there. Threw on a dress shirt and some jeans and headed down to Cheshire Bridge.

Started off in a good mood. Immediately ran into Nigel who gave me grief for not having a drink.

"I JUST got in the door, man!"
"That's no excuse!"

Chatted with Nigel for a bit and some asshole bumped into him and almost sent his wine glass flying. Fuckhead didn't even apologize to him. This was to set the tone for the evening.

Ran into Asterid who gave me a giant hug and told me K.'s car had just got hit by some asshole in the parking lot and K. was busy trying to run him down and confront the guy. Caught up with S. from TN who was loading in C.'s outfit for her stage show. He seemed in a good mood and was ready for a good night. I wandered around a bit, caught up with a few people who just shook my hand and split to the dance floor.

Since I've been out of steady work, my view toward the weekend has been skewed. Since most all of my days are free (consumed by job hunting and what not but not actual "work", per se), the weekends don't mean a hell of a lot to me. When I WAS working, the weekends were for blowing off steam. I had drinks to down, tunes to listen to. I guess I was looking to actually CATCH UP and TALK TO PEOPLE.

You CAN'T do that in an over-crowded, LOUD dance club. I'm not sure why I thought I could do that. Maybe it was that I WANTED to do that, not thinking that that was pretty impossible, given the circumstances.

Anyway, after being the Quick Greet Treatment, I gave up and just hung at the bar. Got to catch C.'s show (and "wardrobe malfunction". Damn those pasties!). During the show, people kept bumping into me as they passed by. No shit, I must have been run INTO by at least half a dozen people. No one looked twice, no one apologized. After the fourth time I spilled my one drink on my shirt, I was starting to get pissed. Was I just invisible? Since I'm shy, I kind of blend into a crowd but I'm NOT a small person, sizewise. What the fuck was going on here?

Seemed to me that a lot of the people running into me were "Normals". Let me explain: The place I was at used to be a Goth Club. When it first opened, it was mainly Scene People there. In my opinion, I started to dislike the place when "Normal People" showed up - the curious, the fucking Frat Boyz, the Suburb Kids, etc. I'm not really part of the scene (even back then) but the "Normal" people seemed to be there just to gawk, get drunk, score drugs or just be general pains in the ass. Got me. Same thing applied Saturday night. Most of the people that were rude were just "Normals".

The club was VERY crowded and I was getting hot. When I get hot, I get irritable. I was getting more and more pissed off. The heat, the crowds, ANOTHER asshole spilling my tiny Rum n' Coke on my dress shirt. I knew I really wanted to say hi to a lot of people but I was getting very pissed off, very quickly. I decided to jet. I downed my drink just as some short little fuck ran into my elbow, knocking the rest of my drink down my neck. At this point, I was ready to go after the guy - and that just ISN'T me anymore. I admit, I had some true prickish moments back in college & afterwards but I make a real point NOT to be that person anymore. I left - and literally mowed down the last asshole to bump into me. I bumped him into the bar and he hit the floor. I really wanted to go back and grab him but I split. Hit the parking lot and got in the car.

I got a lot of text message from people asking me where I was (even from _______ demanding I show up for the "killer afterparty"). No way, not that night. I SMS'd a few back and apologized that I just wasn't feeling it that night.

The drive home calmed me somewhat but I was still upset about things. I REALLY wanted to talk to a bunch of my friends but I realize that just doesn't happen in night clubs. I'd LIKE to become better friends with people; some people I just rarely see at clubs and that's the extent of our relationship and I'm not too thrilled with that. Maybe since some of my older friends have been giving me a rough time, I'm looking to make new friends. I was pissed off at myself that I almost lost my temper to the point where I was wanting to get in a fight. I'm fucking FOURTY now; those days are behind me. Even as goddamn awful as things are for me now at least I'm not in jail. Prison is not a viable alternative to UnEmployment, Andrew.

I'm upset I missed the fun and my friends and maybe making some new friends but I AM glad that I made a point to leave and cool off.

I guess this entry was just for myself, to kind of step back and figure out what was going on with myself that night.

Not sure if anyone else reads these things anymore. Comments are very appreciated, especially so from my ATL friends (who might have even been there that night).
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I am obviously not in ATL, but AM reading.

I know what ya mean about weekends, for a diff reason (since I do so much freelance, I work every day really so weekends are times I can catch up with other folk BUT) and yah I know what ya mean. You can't catch up in that situation and it just brews. I'm sorry man.
Just got hot & pissed off. I'm sure on some level I realized that night clubs are NOT the place to catch up with friends. I think I just wanted to talk to people that night and that's not really what the event was FOR.

Gahhh, got me.

Cheers, man. At least I got out for HST's BDay.
It was a crowded weird ass night, and not one for conversation. I stayed on the dance floor throwing elbows and fought for my space- which I got.
But I totally get what you are saying..
I was pretty hesitant to get in a fight, especially over such a thing as some prick spilled my drink on me. I was in the frame of mind to take out more anger on this guy than he deserved... and that definitely wasn't good thing. Thought I had gotten over that BS.

WAS good to see you out & about, if only for a little bit. Good to see you smilin', babe.
well, i am not in ATL either, but I too am reading. Blows that you didnt get to talk to your friends or meet new people. Hope you can get some actual friendly interaction soon! I know what its like to be so solitary that you just get to the point you want to actually *TALK* to people, and yet it just is not possible. Hope things get better for you soon. Hope things get better for EVERYONE soon, really.
I just rarely write in here and its all pretty deep stuff. Just wasn't sure...

Well, I have to admit, I've occasionally gone to the grocery store just to talk to people and get out of my room. Sad but true.

Yeah, hoping more for everyone myself. Lot of people having it tough.
Definitely one of the reasons I dislike bars/clubs. If I'm there, it's to hang with people, and you just can't do that when surrounded by a bunch of idiots and a wall of sound. Gimme a bottle and the comfort of my front room with a few close friends, any day.
I've been that way most of my life. I know I can count on a small gathering of friends to "behave". Not like you'd intentionally invite some rude jerk to your house to hang out with you.

Maybe I just need to keep my eyes out for another cookout or BDay get together with my friends.

I was there to hang out with friends... and, of course, check out the scantily clad fetish babes.
Well, I read these and you are better than I - I would have clobbered someone. There's no need to be rude, really. I guess I just don't understand the lack of manners that is so prevalent today. Not my style, for sure.
No, you would have pulled a sword on 'em! :)

Seemed more of the "tourists" there were the rude ones. Maybe people are more rude these days because there's little deterrent for acting like an ass. Gone are the days of bar fights. I'm guilty of that crap back in my late teens/early twenties.
i may no longer be in the atl, but i know the longing you speak of when going to a club and wanting to make connection that aren't straight up ass tappings.

it's really hard. you gotta hook, line, and sink them for food afterward. THAT'S when you get to know them.
And the ATL is poorer because of you not here, babe. I'm sure I could use several dozen asses to tap but I wasn't there for that.

Thanks for the words, you. :)